


Monster

by imaynotlivetoseetomorrow



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Gen, Sad, poor son of Hades, thoughts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-10
Updated: 2016-11-10
Packaged: 2018-08-30 03:40:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8517145
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imaynotlivetoseetomorrow/pseuds/imaynotlivetoseetomorrow
Summary: Nico is a monster. No one's told him otherwise. 
(This is a short story I was inspired to write when I got to thinking very deeply about my favorite son of Hades and how he may have felt sometimes on his own.)





	

_"Was there any point anyway?"_

_"What do you mean?"_

_"I mean . . . I can't remember the reason I ever cared. So maybe you should just forget it, too."_

A monster. Is that what he was? He didn't know. No one seemed to know. First he was a friend, then he was _that one guy_. Care only stepped in when it was convenient.

He sighed and slumped further, burying his cold hands in his jacket. Numb. Empty. But the pain was still there. How was that possible? Why was it possible?

Stupid emotions. Stupid, stupid, stupid.

He used to hope, right? Everyone had to at one point. Hope and dream for something to happen, for that one thing to come true, for that one person to wake up and realize. But that was childish. He knew that now. Correction: he'd known that but had been too naïve to accept it.  
He bit the inside of his lip, running both hands through his thick, inky-black hair. He tugged the knots loose, feeling a despondent wish that straightening his life out was as easy as pulling a few tangles from his hair. It wouldn't be worth it then, he supposed. Yet it was a nice concept, a bittersweet one.

Perhaps he was nearing some sort of barrier. One he wouldn't be able to just cut down like all the others. One with no end on either side, no way to simply ignore and walk around. And he didn't think he had the strength or will to climb over. Not anymore.

A knock on the wall made him look up. He said nothing as the son of Poseidon slid down beside him quietly. He turned his head away, resuming staring at the cement. He didn't want to deal with anyone right now. Least of all him.

"Hey, Nico," he began, his voice low. Nico could sense the caution below it like the torrent currents hiding beneath the surface of calm waters. If he didn't tread carefully, he'd be knocked off his feet and swept away.

He felt Percy's gaze on his face, felt the probing sea green eyes searching for a reason, a sign that he was listening. But even the dead can lay still and appear to listen.

"Listen, Neeks, I - "

His head snapped toward him. "What did you just say?"

Percy smiled his infamous lopsided grin, raising an eyebrow. "Gotcha." He playfully elbowed Nico. His smile faltered. "But seriously, what's up? We've been worried. I've been worried."

He refused to look at him, to give this oblivious son of Poseidon any hints. It was pointless.

Instead he took a deep breath, forced a weary half-smile, and said, "Nothing. I've just been tired, is all. How about you go catch up with the others? I need a moment to think."

He could tell Percy found the abrupt dismissal strange. The concern was as evident as a flashing neon sign in those vivid, ignorantly deep eyes of his. "Yeah. Yeah, sure. Hurry, though, 'kay?"

Percy took off hesitantly when he gave a curt nod. Nico let the less than half-assed facade fade like a passing shadow as soon as he was out of sight. His dark eyes refocused on the ground and his ever-numb fingers tightened into fists in his pockets. The conversation between them came rushing back again, echoing in the caverns of his hollow chest:

_"And how could I forget? It's not that simple - "_

_"And don't think I ever said it was. Just try."_

_"But I can't - "_

_"You can. You will. Just remember me for the worst. Remember the monster. It's suddenly a lot easier, isn't it?"_

_A bitter laugh followed, but there was no humor in the depressing sound. "Is that really how you think it works?"_

_" . . . Yeah. I guess it is. And no one's ever told me different."_

Nico closed his eyes. Just remember the monster.

He leaned back and melted into the shadows along the wall, once more a part of the void in every sense of the word. The others would notice he wasn't coming soon enough. They'd move on.

They usually did.


End file.
